X and Y:m I a loner??

X:thr?

Y:yup!!

X:dude?

Y:kya hua be

X:In a week how many times u call home
or they call u?

Y:y do u ask re
on an average once
???

X:and who else do u call?

Y:pahle bata ye kaisa survey hai?

X:It's not a survey
m just checking ki m i the only one who has screwed up his relationships

Y:except for home,
aur kisi ko shayad hi kabhi kabhi,may be once in 1 month or 2 months
y do u ask?

X:because i don call anyone

Y:not even home?

X:sometimes if i m busy I even dont recieve calls.. and baad mai call karna bhool jaata hoon
ghar waale mujhe call kar lete hai once a while
but I dont remember calling them without purpose

Y:abe almost same mera bhi yahi haal hai....and mostly the purpose ..money

X:mere cousins specifically mujhse naraaj hai...uncles and all...they feel as if I ignore them

Y:wat happens to me is that i dont find anything to talk abt

X:And also...
and the big one
I kind of have a girl

Y:he he

X:Let's not get into specifics of who she is

Y:kind of bole to,committed nahin hai kya ?

X:She lives in Delhi with her parents
committed nhi
we r not yet clear...things are messed up

Y:wo ya tum?

X:Both I think
Some engineering college in Haryana
She stays there in hostel

Y:wat..she eats up all ur time or sumthing?

X:nah...i dont let her...
The issue again is phone..

Y:?

X:She loves to make long calls...the ones that last hours..I dont
15 minutes is more than enough for me...

Y:everywer its the same ,they talk 2 long

X:She was in Delhi for the last 15 days..and we didnt meet once
Hardly talked on phone...

Y:n y was that ?

X:Now, when She's gone...I regret it
i dont know...imulsive procastrination..i guess
*impulsive

Y:lol re

X:i always thought ki kal mil loonga..kal
..kal..
par aaj when it was the last day....interview aa gayi

Y:thats sum story....gf ke liye hi waqt nahi

X:room par baith kar bore hota rehta hoon

Y:abe itna doori lagta hai, to use dost ki tarah le na

X:that is what I have planned
and I am now looking for some other chick who is based in Delhi

Y:le tu bhi chaupat ram hai
sale us ladki mein kya kharabi mil gayi tujhe,aisa aksar hota hai be

X:abey koi kahrabi nhi hai...or may be I have not come across
one
but I dont think ki I can keep that going

Y:jaisa tu soche

X:but still....
before her phone calls, I thought i was a good listener...but she made me realise that m not

Y:sale relastionship se listening kar ke tu ladkiyon ko samajh raha tha kya?
i 2 m confused,to tell d truth i mostly call home once a month ,and i m not really sure y is that

X:I have figured out...
I m a loner....
and I cant help it

Y:abey evr1 needs sum space of his own..thats not being a loner

X:maybe I need a bit more

Y:the more confused u r abt things the more space u need,and the more u push people away

X:would a rgime help?
*regime

Y:a routine u say??

X:hmm...
but the problem that I feel with it is...It brings artificiality...u no more remains natural
*remain

Y:abe routine helps but that feeling creeps in again sooner or later...jyada aage ki na soch be ...be urself

X:last semester...I have loads of time at my disposal...

Y:to(then)
?

x:aajkal aise time paas kar raha hoon
trying to figure out what is wrong with me

Y:nothing re...evr1 is different n so r u...dont figure out wats wrong..but rather just figure urself out

defiance and/or vent-off

Except for the fact that people cast their vote, and a "free" media there is hardly any semblance of democracy in the ways of our country.

This system of governance that was designed by the British,with the sole purpose of ruling and not serving the country;the rules - for the British,of the British and by the British-has been by and large adopted with the British replaced by the power hungry and greedy section of the society,that are our politicians.Thus so much power vests in the hands of the politicians that the one begins to wonder about the independence of the judiciary,legislative and the executive,as laid out in our constitution.The executive has a much stronger hold over the society than the judiciary –having the whole civil law enforcing agent of the constitution-the police-as its puppet,to play with the people as it wills.

The MPs make legislations,the government implements them.The disapproval over the law that follows in many cases, mostly stems from the fact that the decision-making process does not involve the people that are going to be affected by it.
As one would wonder that if the MPs are choosen by the people,does not that mean people have a say in the process of making legislations. Thinking of it,how do people decide which candidate they should vote for?

For almost all of rural India,caste is the most important factor. For urban regions(where educated people need evolved tools to be manipulated) the parameters are both larger and somewhat complex,but nonetheless including caste,money(hence power and influence),media(and hence the extent it is biased depending on a candidate's "influence")...
The incumbent government is always at a higher ground thence,as it gets to advertise as it wills-by using hoardings that we see all across the cities and the newspaper pages exclusively dedicated to "let" the common man know of the various schemes and projects being undertaken by the government all over the country-these fooling only the most naive,and is an important tool for rural regions,where people are so desperate for any development that even though they know what most of the candidates are up to,they want themselves to believe the promises that are made to them.And depending on which candidate has made better promises,combined with caste factor,they go to polls each time hoping for a government that would give them somewhat better chances of survival than that "ruled them" earlier.

Also the voter is faced with one more dielemma;when he votes for a candidate in his constituency,not only is he choosing an MP for that constituency,but at the same time choosing the national leader,PM, by voting for a particular political party to which the local candidate belongs.Thus he has to shoot two targets with one arrow;this is so as the voter may like the leader of a party say Congress to be the PM,but to vote him up he has to choose the congress candidate of the constituency he is in,who he may or may not like to represent his constituency.
This system of voting makes things as complicated and ugly as it can get.Bills cant get passed(except for those that serve the MPs) as the arithmatic of the coalition government is far to complex;no government gets elected with a majority of its own,and is thus always too weak to make any radical changes that the situation of the country demands.
As a result we have become a country that cannot decide whether women should have more say in the administration,whether the PDS should be universalised(or should I say whether let millions die from hunger or not);the number of pending bills just goes on increasing.Even though we have an economic-architect as our PM,we dont see the most obvious reforms being implemented,as he can hardly take a decision on its own.

I think I will stop here .More when I get frustrated again with the ways of governance...this time it was the CWG and the MP "salary" hike(now 68 times an average indian earns,not including the salary they get for not spending public money on public projects).

Give us the OLYMPICS next time!!

On CWG and how corruption goes with everything in India-
"We are a curious nation. For nine months we pray for the monsoon, and the moment our prayers are answered, we have no idea what to do. It is as if the showers came once a century rather than once a year.
You don’t need to summon Agatha Christie to solve the plot. Most of our roads are constructed for annual destruction, since there is more money to be made in rebuilding than in building. Governments are not merely hand-in-glove with contractors; they are hand-in-pocket. Shared loot is safe loot.
What does the System do when it does not have an answer? It changes the question.
Witness how the rage against corruption in CWG has been manoeuvred into a debate on whether they can be held successfully. Who was responsible for this delay in the first place? Even this question has been diverted.
We do not know if any race in CWG will see a nail-biting finish, but certainly the preparation has acquired a nail-biting dénouement"-M J AKBAR,Sunday Guardian.

Everyone knows what part corruption plays in our day to day life as a nation,anything I write would be just under-emphasising.
Foreigners ask "How come your Hotels are so good when your roads are so pot-holed?"-simple enough-roads construction involve politicians while (most) hotels dont,so a road has to break down so that money can be made again next year.

And God,the amount of money they have made over the CWG,can make the mouths of even the greatest critics,go watery.

Life gOes oN!!

The ability to think has been the greatest gift bestowed upon us by G__ or"whoever it is"-this I sincerely believed.I also read somewhere that it was the way of the universe through which it tries and tends to understand itself.Nice na?
Life gives one or two jerks,we are thrown out of the “way”and all these thoughts disappear into nowhere.Restlessness sweeps in.This is also the time when we start to know insomnia in somewhat greater depth.
One thought leading to next.
I imagine it like a large bell inside a reverberating chamber(that is my head),where my thoughts are both:the sound that the bell produces and the also the hammer that hits the bell to produce the sound in the first place.This way the clamour just keeps getter louder and louder inside the head.It dares to crack your skull out-and it cant come out.The outside is too vehement already and there is no chance of a resonance between the two.Even then so many of us manage to retain  our sanity somehow, is an amazing feat in itself,I think.
The actions that we take are nothing but the worldy form of our thoughts,and our actions determine the quality of life we live,which in turn influences our thoughts.A vicious cycle indeed.

Getting a grip seems almost impossible as your mind is too busy then playing host to your past’s  "should have's-shouldnt have's"and projections of how nice it would be if this and that happens.Always thinking of the past ,planning for the future ,never bothering for the present.
Then someday somehow you pull yourself together to  escape this maze.It seems only a matter of time when you are lured in again as mind we are not seperate from this gift called “mind”. Thence

LIFE GOES ON!!

LIE begets TrUtH

Imagine how the world would react to the announcement of The DOW Chmicals’ spokesperson that the company is going to pay its liabilities of US $12 billion towards the world’s worst industrial disaster ~Bhopal.How the victims would feel? No need for that visual modality actually,one just needs to go to the news archives of the 20th “anniversary”(for DOW it certainly is one delighting moment,for it got away un-liabilitated ) of the tragedy.

It was pulled off by “THE YES MEN-FIX THE WORLD” , a loose-knit association of some 300 impostors worldwide,with a single moto:”Impersonating big-time “criminals” in order to publicly humiliate them.Targets are leaders and big corporations who put profits ahead of everything else.”

I cant say how much I liked and enjoyed the idea.After the announcement was made on BBC-World TV ,to some 300 million viewers worldwide,every news channel could be seen with analysts and experts saying that what needed to be done has been done,a very very rightful thing to do,better late than never…..

And after it was realised it was all a hoax about 2 hrs later ,what was on was that how the imposters had hurt the feelings of the victims by creating false hope.The two “imposters” CAME TO India to try to find out if that had been the case.To their surprise,after interacting with a lot of victims ,they found out that they were rather happy that someone had raised the issue that the world seemed to have long forgotten."Sometimes it takes a lie to expose the truth.”-they say.

Just so that u know,DOW paid all Union Carbide’s liabilities in the US- courtesy a robust judiciary,but didnt bother about more than 5 lakh victims in Bhopal.And coutesy to the snail’s pace of trials in our country-the verdict of the Supreme Court of India came 25 years later.What is even more hilarious is the charges the culprits have been convicted with ~same one gets for a traffic incident.

This kind of mockery of the value of life and citizens create an environment where corporates think they can do anything,and actually start doing so-in the name of collateral damage for the sake of development and greater good.

Take TATA Communications,e.g.,which has been shitting us for months now with its service,parting us from our hardly-ever-enough money.I even need to hurry writing this piece out for I dont know when the connection will die again. Had it been the US I would have had them sued at least 10 times by now.This frustration is the reason I went on to detail aaaaalllllllllllllll that,by the way.

Oh..am really slow with the keys.

continued…

tHe ImPeCcAbLe SoLuTiOn

For years ,(bio)scientists,have been trying to make clones of human beings.
Experiments were underway since the 50's.Many attempts has been made since on various animal species(mice,sheep,cat,etc etc) ,but human cloning remains a dream(though ethically challenged by many)even today. But believe me when I tell u ,they have been looking the wrong way on this .
For these few weeks ,I have been watching a TV series LOST .And it gave me the idea on how to do it.Am publishing this journal(ha!) so that scientists (all over the world) may see and work on my idea,because I dont hav that kind of facilities that they do have.
I figured it out that instead of dedicating its time to biological experiments,the scientific community must focus on physics.Yes,Physics has the answer and the solution is

GOING BACK IN TIME.

The clones as we get through cell mutation are almost nil as far as knowledge or experience they should possess with(according to) their age(refer to TV series KYLE XY).
But if a person is made to travel back in time ,the back-in-time one has got everything as far as his mind and body is concerned(actually,he is a notch higher,after having got the time travel experience). A 20 year old sent back 2 hrs ,can be called an almost perfect copy-cat.(This may even be applied to species that r on the verge of extinction…O God ,m a genius)
But I am sure this approach will have even stiff opposition from the conservative lobby regarding the effects it will have on the society.

(But wen has the mankind refrained from doing things that were not "ethical" or "moral")

let there be "light"

Most of us see addiction as an seemingly incorrigible habit of drinking,smoking or taking drugs.But the human mind is so potent and dab,and our "self" so egoistic ,that we all together fail to recognize other faces of addiction or thoughtless-obsession.

Let me tell u wat i see around myself daily.I see people "worshipping";no offence, but that is not worship,that cant be.
Much of that is imitation,and of such a form that one doesnt know it themselves.Sometimes that is called ("blind")faith in the almighty.

Much of this deception of faith is born out of the habits inculcated in them at their childhood.Those who dont search out the meanings of this pandemic paedagogy just remain trapped,n continue to do the things they see aroud themselves and oh,wat they see is everyone doing the same .And it is hardly of any importance to remind that a mob is like a troop. They do it in fear,not in faith,faith is a totally different thing feeling,realization.Fear of being ostracized from our so called religious society.Or worst still they do it out of selfishness believing that it will be rewarded by blessing,being looked upon by HIM.


There is also another reason: identity.One who is even only a bit conscious may soon realise that our religious rituals hardly make any sense to him.But even then he allows himself to be clutched.bcoz if he aint a hindu ,if he aint a christian,if he aint a muslim,then who he is .
It is needless to say of the plights of people who break-off the "shackles".They find themselves wid sum sort of "social identity" crisis.Association wid the society becomes almost impossible.
And thus a stark irony pops up in my mind.We thought of addiction something that makes us to be looked down upon by others in some way or other,and he,here it makes us reverent.
Lastly I would like to say that when i go through the crap-work above from an objective point of view ,even i picture the blogger as some gloomy personality,one who doesnt find any sense in religions.U may figure me as a handicap trying to learn rugby,and on the doomed failure cursing the game itself.
But it always makes sense to look at the moon,not at the finger or the person ,pointing towards that!